Do you ever sit there and feel like everyone else just gets it? Like they just somehow understand the lesson faster, make decisions quicker, figure themselves out sooner, and you are kind of just there…trying?

For the longest time, I thought I was behind. Behind in school. Behind in leadership. Behind in knowing who I was supposed to be. I have always had a harder time focusing, and it still impacts me more than most people probably realize. My brain does not move in straight lines. It jumps, it circles. Sometimes it takes longer to land somewhere that actually feels right or comfortable. When you grow up in a world that rewards speed and quick results, it can make you feel different. I started to believe that different meant delayed.

I would look around and think…Why does this seem easier for everyone else? What am I doing wrong?

I felt this a lot in school. There were moments when everyone around me would finish an assignment quickly, start talking about the next thing, and I was still processing the first part. Or in group projects when people could confidently throw out ideas right away, and I needed a minute to sort through my thoughts before speaking. I started to assume that if something did not come fast to me..it just meant I was not as capable as my peers.

The same thing happened in BBYO. When I joined, it felt like everyone already knew the traditions, the chants, and how everything worked. I worried that I had joined too late and missed my moment. I remember sitting at my first few events feeling excited but also slightly out of place, like everyone else had already climbed a few steps ahead of me.

But over time, I noticed something that changed my perspective on things! I realized that the people who seemed so comfortable once felt new too. They did not start confidently. They practiced. They showed up. They learned. And instead of comparing how fast I was climbing to how fast they were, I started focusing on the fact that I was climbing at all.

We are all climbing the same staircase. We ALL want growth, confidence, belonging, and purpose. That destination is shared. But how we get up each step is our own personal journey. Some people take two steps at a time. Some people hold onto the railing super tight. Some people pause halfway just because they are tired. Some people take a different side of the staircase entirely. It does not mean they are necessarily going somewhere else. It just means their journey looks different.

This goes beyond BBYO, too. People say they cannot join a sport because others started when they were five. They do not try something new because they think they are too far behind to ever catch up. I used to think like that. I would talk myself out of things before even starting because I assumed I had already missed my chance.

But compared to who exactly?

This is everyone’s first time living, being alive. There is no universal timeline for everything to happen. There is no correct age to become confident. There is no rule that says you have to start earlier for something to count.

What changed for me was realizing that taking longer did not mean I was failing. It meant I was thinking deeply. It meant I cared. When I stopped measuring my worth against other people’s speed and started valuing my own growth, I felt relief. I began raising my hand even if my idea was not perfectly formed yet. I volunteered for things even when I was nervous. I showed up to events even if I did not know anyone there. I pushed myself out of my comfort zone and, somewhere along the way, I found people who felt like home through BBYO. I stopped waiting to feel completely ready and started letting myself become ready through experience!

You are capable of anything and everything. Not because you are guaranteed to be the best at it, but because trying is not something that is just reserved for the people who started first. What you believe about your pace determines how you experience it. If you see taking longer as failure, it will most definitely feel like failure. If you see taking longer as growth, it will become your biggest strength!

You are not behind. Maybe you are just climbing. And maybe the way you climb is exactly what will make the view worth it (it is).